Monday, June 25, 2012
For those with adult children who leave the Faith, it isn't surprising. Our Culture is toxic and we swim in the culture. He emphasized that some of our kids will serve the church and others will serve time! It's just the way it is. Jesus couldn't get most people to follow Him even though he is God so what do we expect? We can't even do a card trick much less miracles! He said that you can be a much better example of our Spiritual Faith by getting along well with difficult family members than by knowing all about the Saints but acting like a jerk. It is more important to LIVE the Faith than just teach it.
I later went to his talk entitled " Lessons From Life From Children". This was as funny as his earlier talk. He delivers a great message while keeping the audience rolling! He first pointed out that as parents we tend to ask how our kids how they are and they no sooner open their mouths then we launch into our lectures.
He called women "Estrogen Americans" and said that there is one thing that men hate to hear. That is, "I think we need to talk" which, he said, is code language for " Do you have an hour because I'm going to tell you everything that's wrong with you..."!
He stated that one of the main things that he is hearing on his radio call-in show and in talking to people is that women are THE authority figure in their homes. Disney Dad wants to be Mr. Good-Times who is laid back and oblivious to what is going on. They seem to be only along for the ride. They say to the kids "Do what your mother tells you. I do what your mother tells me. Why else do you think I'm still alive???" lol. Most men wouldn't let anybody else talk to their wives the way their kids talk to her all day long! He said that a husband needs to PROTECT her from this! He mentioned that she will feel very romantic towards him if he would protect her from the kids ganging up on her. He used to slip his sons a couple of bucks to get sassy with her so he could step in to save the day!
Women are in the trenches. Dad gets out and about in the world and is able to keep his sanity a little longer! It's no wonder that she is no longer the girl he married! He said the worst thing that Dad can say is, "If it were up to me I'd let you, but your mother...." Husbands shouldn't make their wives out to be the crazy, unreasonable one, the Bad Guy.
Parents always want to know "why" a kid does what he does. " What is in his mind?" they wonder. He said that we don't have to know why, we just have to DO something about the behavior. Behavior change is a slow, agonizing process. It is an uphill slog. The measure of a saint is in his or her PERSEVERANCE. Human change is to persevere over a long period of time. You don't rest until you get to Heaven!
Dr. Guarendi has a DVD of many of his skits on the topic of "Why Be Catholic?" He left the church for 10 years and was very active in another one before returning. I am told that like his talks, his DVD is hilarious- delivering a great message while making you laugh your head off. I purchased this and am looking forward to watching it with my family.
Much of his talk was on the Fourth Commandment, "Honor Thy Father and Mother." He believes that many of our problems today can be traced to a disregard for this commandment. Charity begins at home. There should be Kinship at home. It shouldn't be an empty place with what we consider "real life" going on outside of it. The Church defends the family as the core of the social order. Commandment 4 leads the rest of the Social Commandments (5-10). We should be good children and good parents.
Filial Piety helped China to maintain its' Social order for a millenium! Mao tse Tung ushered in communism and was responsible for many deaths. He was a man who hated his father, as did Stalin.
When you split the family, it is like splitting an atom- tremendous pressure and an explosion results. Destructive passions are released. As the family goes, so goes the parish, the church and society.
We should have Masses said for our children and should remove every occasion of sin from our homes. He said that we should never underestimate the power of the Devil. If we don't ask for help from above then we won't get it.
He recommended that we read the Book of Tobias which he said captures most of Salvation History and mentions every level of creation. There are angels, men, birds,dogs,fish, and the demon. It is a story of Heaven and Hell meeting on Earth in a battle for Marriage. He went on to list all the "typeography" from this book.
We should pray to God for discernment in choosing a marriage partner. We need to make sure. In Tobias, the marriage was between two people from the same "tribe." By choosing someone from the same religion, one can pass on the fullness of the Faith in its wholeness-without having it watered down. It is difficult to do this when one parent is struggling against the other.
The Devil hates the institution of marriage. He destroys peace in marriage and sows division. The "head" of the family should be the father and the "heart" the mother. Christ and His Church form an indissoluble bond, like marriage. The Mass is a pleasing odor to God. The devil was smoked out of there (in the book of Tobias). Be married in front of the altar in church, he said. Good families help to make good marriages.
Keep the observance of Sunday rest.The example of parents is super important! Parents should show a good example even when it costs them.The role of the parents cannot be replaced.
The world, he says, is the family on a larger scale. We have to live our lives everyday with the people we live with. The attack on the family began with the attack on marriage and on babies. We are undermining our own foundation.
The object of Liberty is Life. The pursuit of happiness is not the pursuit of pleasure. The pursuit of pleasure tends to be the pursuit of unhappiness.
Life, liberty and happiness is found in the HOME. More and more, we are leaving our homes. The family is where life is found. The family is a Kingdom founded on Love which creates its own citizens.
The individual is not the basic unit of society- the family is. Anything that attacks the family is bad for society. A civilization that attacks the family will not survive. The family will outlive it. There is constant cultural pressure on fathers and mothers. Sexual morality has decayed tremendously.
Chesterton had a lot to say about economics, says Ahlquist. Our present economy is proof that massive lending and spending cannot be sustained which is why it is falling apart. We are developing an industrialized consumeristic family. Our work, recreation and education are taking place outside of the home. The home should be the center of that stuff. We should be a productive household instead of a consumeristic one. The kitchen, workshop and garden of the home used to take care of almost everything it needed. For 1500 years, that was how life was lived. Children were the primary ASSETS of the home! In the 1920's consumerism took over and parents wanted to be amused and have amusements. Today retailers are going out of business because there are not enough people to buy what they have to sell.
He said ( I am not sure if he got this from Chesterton or if this was his personal opinion) that today a college education is the most over- priced and over-rated product for sale out there. Parents scrape and sacrifice to provide it and find their children coming home to refute everything they ever taught them.
The predicted Population Bomb has turned out to be the exact opposite of all the warnings. When Social Security started, there were 15 workers for every elder it supported. Today there are three workers for each elder and in the future there will only be two workers to support each elder receiving it.
The financial center of our country used to be New York. Now it is Washington, D.C. where they are trying to solve our borrowing problems by more borrowing.
Pope Leo the 13th talked about the idea of "Distributism" which Chesterton believed in. Families need to be more autonomous and independent in taking care of their own needs. There needs to be a "Bottom Up " solution to our problems. The solution needs to be done "by "people, not "to" people.
We are witnessing in our society the natural consequences of unnatural actions which is the result of the devaluation of children.
When things fall apart, The Family and the Church will still be here. We continue to drift away from the hearth and the family.
Civilization decays by forgetting the ordinary things. Modern life exerts great strain and stress on the family. People no longer value normal things and our structure is falling apart.
Dear Lord Jesus, Please protect all those in and around the water this summer as we relax and enjoy your beautiful creation. Thank you for our Guardian Angels and help us to hear the whisperings of their guidance. We pray that You keep us all safe, if it be Thy Holy Will. Amen.
Janette, pictured in the center of the bottom row above, is a gourmet cook! Look what she prepared for these sixteen lucky ladies:
What all of these ladies have in common is our love of Homeschooling. I have known most of these women for over 15 years and have seen some of them occasionally, but most of them very often on our homeschooling journeys. I really respect them and admire them all. This luncheon was timed beautifully as we had just finished another year of hard work!
Janette was celebrating a milestone birthday and had prepared trivia questions from TV shows that were popular decades ago. Being educators, we all love tests and some gals were VERY good at this!!! I am glad that this wasn't graded because I failed miserably. You know what a TV expert I am. As a group, we were probably more likely to share a book addiction! That would have been some serious competition!
I saw almost no time wasted while I was there because Greg was clearly in charge of what needed to be done and in what sequence. Everyone worked very hard and steadily.
I loved seeing the Dads from both sides of Greg and Cindi's family working together in addition to brothers, in-laws and a nephew. This is how boys learn to be manly men!
By the following weekend, the rails were up and one set of stairs completed. The huge new deck adds lots of outdoor living space to Greg and Cindi's home. I hope to enjoy a grilled hamburger soon and someday look forward to watching my grandson play in his big backyard!